{"topic":{"id":4512,"title":"大家有没有过某个时刻，产生出自我毁灭的想法？","slug":"topic","userId":755,"categoryId":4,"createdAt":"2023-07-26 16:56:34.238003","bumpedAt":"2024-04-16 11:34:19.527896","views":702,"postsCount":11,"highestPostNumber":11,"likeCount":13,"closed":false,"pinned":false,"pinnedGlobally":false,"pinnedAt":null,"pinnedUntil":null,"isBanner":false,"excerpt":"可能晚上多愁善感吧，随便聊聊。小时候我非常怕死，一想到一闭眼就再也睁不开，就害怕的如坠冰窟。但随着长大，总有几个时刻会觉得人生毫无意义，没有什么奋斗的目标，也没有什么人或事来成为人生的支柱。考试，做课题，找实习，毕业……不断的在完成一个个任务，但却不明白做这些事的意义是什么。再往后想，工作，结婚生子，换个角色重复这场无休止的任务完成之旅。感觉看到头，只剩下疲倦。以及生活中的一些负面信息吧，家庭不算幸福，没有什么感情生活，一切都那…","deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"isPrivate":false,"isMembersOnly":false,"category":{"id":4,"name":"谈笑风生","slug":"general","color":"25AAE2"},"author":{"id":755,"username":"whowanttoleave","name":"丢掉大脑丢烦恼","avatarUrl":"/uploads/image/c9/43/c9439a8cfa2a69c00c763fe0d2ec7bb26028264bf682a2993434ba9032dd9696.avif"},"realAuthor":{"id":755,"username":"whowanttoleave","name":"丢掉大脑丢烦恼","avatarUrl":"/uploads/image/c9/43/c9439a8cfa2a69c00c763fe0d2ec7bb26028264bf682a2993434ba9032dd9696.avif"},"tags":[]},"posts":[{"id":8022,"postNumber":1,"raw":"可能晚上多愁善感吧，随便聊聊。\n小时候我非常怕死，一想到一闭眼就再也睁不开，就害怕的如坠冰窟。\n但随着长大，总有几个时刻会觉得人生毫无意义，没有什么奋斗的目标，也没有什么人或事来成为人生的支柱。\n考试，做课题，找实习，毕业……不断的在完成一个个任务，但却不明白做这些事的意义是什么。再往后想，工作，结婚生子，换个角色重复这场无休止的任务完成之旅。感觉看到头，只剩下疲倦。\n以及生活中的一些负面信息吧，家庭不算幸福，没有什么感情生活，一切都那么单调。\n有几个瞬间真觉得活着好无趣，自我毁灭的想法倒还显得有点别样新奇。\n不会自杀，因为怕疼。如果违规，烦请删除。","cooked":"

可能晚上多愁善感吧，随便聊聊。
\n小时候我非常怕死，一想到一闭眼就再也睁不开，就害怕的如坠冰窟。
\n但随着长大，总有几个时刻会觉得人生毫无意义，没有什么奋斗的目标，也没有什么人或事来成为人生的支柱。
\n考试，做课题，找实习，毕业……不断的在完成一个个任务，但却不明白做这些事的意义是什么。再往后想，工作，结婚生子，换个角色重复这场无休止的任务完成之旅。感觉看到头，只剩下疲倦。
\n以及生活中的一些负面信息吧，家庭不算幸福，没有什么感情生活，一切都那么单调。
\n有几个瞬间真觉得活着好无趣，自我毁灭的想法倒还显得有点别样新奇。
\n不会自杀，因为怕疼。如果违规，烦请删除。

\n","createdAt":"2023-07-26 16:56:34.391775","updatedAt":"2023-07-26 16:56:34.391775","replyToPostNumber":null,"replyCount":0,"likeCount":1,"wordCount":271,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[{"reaction":"❤️","count":1,"users":[{"id":1047,"username":"anonymous_coward_old","name":"Anonymous Coward Old"}],"hasReacted":false}],"wiki":false,"version":1,"publicVersion":1,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":755,"username":"whowanttoleave","name":"丢掉大脑丢烦恼","avatarUrl":"/uploads/image/c9/43/c9439a8cfa2a69c00c763fe0d2ec7bb26028264bf682a2993434ba9032dd9696.avif","admin":false,"moderator":false,"signatureRaw":null,"signatureCooked":null}},{"id":8024,"postNumber":2,"raw":"就算是任务，在任务的旅途上也会有各色的风景。\n\n推荐中岛美嘉的《僕が死のうと思ったのは》，希望楼主能走出 emo 的情绪。","cooked":"

就算是任务，在任务的旅途上也会有各色的风景。

推荐中岛美嘉的《僕が死のうと思ったのは》，希望楼主能走出 emo 的情绪。

\n","createdAt":"2023-07-26 17:40:38.674526","updatedAt":"2023-07-26 17:40:46.589397","replyToPostNumber":null,"replyCount":1,"likeCount":1,"wordCount":54,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[{"reaction":"❤️","count":1,"users":[{"id":3273,"username":"anon18815924","name":null}],"hasReacted":false}],"wiki":false,"version":1,"publicVersion":1,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":307,"username":"Fast","name":null,"avatarUrl":null,"admin":false,"moderator":false,"signatureRaw":null,"signatureCooked":null}},{"id":8025,"postNumber":3,"raw":"会去看看，我也觉得自己多少是有点不正常了，谢谢。","cooked":"

会去看看，我也觉得自己多少是有点不正常了，谢谢。

\n","createdAt":"2023-07-26 17:58:16.834697","updatedAt":"2023-07-26 17:58:16.834697","replyToPostNumber":2,"replyCount":0,"likeCount":0,"wordCount":24,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[],"wiki":false,"version":1,"publicVersion":1,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":755,"username":"whowanttoleave","name":"丢掉大脑丢烦恼","avatarUrl":"/uploads/image/c9/43/c9439a8cfa2a69c00c763fe0d2ec7bb26028264bf682a2993434ba9032dd9696.avif","admin":false,"moderator":false,"signatureRaw":null,"signatureCooked":null}},{"id":8027,"postNumber":4,"raw":"小时候经常有，因为一场考试没考好或者犯了个错就感觉天塌了。长大以后感觉生活再困难也是快乐多于痛苦，就没有了。\n如果生活中全是痛苦，感觉 remake 也是很合理的","cooked":"

小时候经常有，因为一场考试没考好或者犯了个错就感觉天塌了。长大以后感觉生活再困难也是快乐多于痛苦，就没有了。
\n如果生活中全是痛苦，感觉 remake 也是很合理的

\n","createdAt":"2023-07-26 19:37:37.706914","updatedAt":"2023-07-26 19:41:26.637058","replyToPostNumber":null,"replyCount":0,"likeCount":1,"wordCount":73,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[{"reaction":"❤️","count":1,"users":[{"id":3273,"username":"anon18815924","name":null}],"hasReacted":false}],"wiki":false,"version":1,"publicVersion":1,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":464,"username":"wxystudio","name":"studio","avatarUrl":null,"admin":false,"moderator":true,"signatureRaw":null,"signatureCooked":null}},{"id":8031,"postNumber":5,"raw":"有过\n我最玉玉的时候应该是大二上了\n疫情封校上网课本就会让人心情不好，再加之被一众大佬反复吊打鞭尸，觉得自己无论怎么一生悬命也还是被薄纱，觉得自己怎么也学不会做不好。看着身边认识的佬们有的去 UCB 交换了、有的已经是课题组里重要的助力了、有的大创和竞赛赢赢赢、有的几乎科科满绩，而我却一直在输输输，绩点也低竞赛也打不过，这也不行那也不会，就是一个彻头彻尾的 loser。然后你交又有一堆意义不明的 SB 课程，例如金工实习，和 CS 毫无关系，还不得不上，学分还不低，又非常难做，做得我很是玉玉。也没有几个朋友可以倾述，恋爱经历也为零。真的会很想 remake。\n\nPS：缓解玉玉的最佳方法就是多看傻卵二刺螈（确信）","cooked":"

有过
\n我最玉玉的时候应该是大二上了
\n疫情封校上网课本就会让人心情不好，再加之被一众大佬反复吊打鞭尸，觉得自己无论怎么一生悬命也还是被薄纱，觉得自己怎么也学不会做不好。看着身边认识的佬们有的去 UCB 交换了、有的已经是课题组里重要的助力了、有的大创和竞赛赢赢赢、有的几乎科科满绩，而我却一直在输输输，绩点也低竞赛也打不过，这也不行那也不会，就是一个彻头彻尾的 loser。然后你交又有一堆意义不明的 SB 课程，例如金工实习，和 CS 毫无关系，还不得不上，学分还不低，又非常难做，做得我很是玉玉。也没有几个朋友可以倾述，恋爱经历也为零。真的会很想 remake。

PS：缓解玉玉的最佳方法就是多看傻卵二刺螈（确信）

\n","createdAt":"2023-07-27 01:28:59.730895","updatedAt":"2023-07-27 03:06:44.244889","replyToPostNumber":null,"replyCount":1,"likeCount":2,"wordCount":280,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[{"reaction":"❤️","count":2,"users":[{"id":755,"username":"whowanttoleave","name":"丢掉大脑丢烦恼"},{"id":3273,"username":"anon18815924","name":null}],"hasReacted":false}],"wiki":false,"version":3,"publicVersion":3,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":176,"username":"TouhouSumi","name":"东方澄","avatarUrl":"/uploads/image/0d/b8/0db83d4f9eb036fd09a9c3d520a6e0e7856751d1740332b9e45aa503d39dabed.avif","admin":false,"moderator":false,"signatureRaw":null,"signatureCooked":null}},{"id":8033,"postNumber":6,"raw":"上你交上的我都想自杀了。后来凭借强大的意志力存活了下来","cooked":"

上你交上的我都想自杀了。后来凭借强大的意志力存活了下来

\n","createdAt":"2023-07-27 02:33:33.699577","updatedAt":"2023-07-27 02:33:33.699577","replyToPostNumber":null,"replyCount":0,"likeCount":5,"wordCount":27,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[{"reaction":"❤️","count":5,"users":[{"id":31,"username":"TsuinoSora","name":null},{"id":426,"username":"Komeiji_Koishi","name":"Komeiji_Koishi"},{"id":464,"username":"wxystudio","name":"studio"},{"id":1211,"username":"WENIWEE","name":"我完全同意"},{"id":3273,"username":"anon18815924","name":null}],"hasReacted":false}],"wiki":false,"version":1,"publicVersion":1,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":369,"username":"3ee28fe1a60c95b89d29317f122c70","name":null,"avatarUrl":"/uploads/image/06/94/069460f3321c06a9a6db8c1be9626829df809d10f291c52a88f7d98821a1f1c2.avif","admin":false,"moderator":false,"signatureRaw":null,"signatureCooked":null}},{"id":8035,"postNumber":7,"raw":"最痛苦的莫过于随波逐流按部就班。或许偶尔 gap 一段时间有奇效（？）\n当然 gap 是奢侈品。或许可以试试找点自己能全身投入并且获得成就感的事喵","cooked":"

最痛苦的莫过于随波逐流按部就班。或许偶尔 gap 一段时间有奇效（？）
\n当然 gap 是奢侈品。或许可以试试找点自己能全身投入并且获得成就感的事喵

\n","createdAt":"2023-07-27 03:20:36.979441","updatedAt":"2023-07-27 03:32:31.168757","replyToPostNumber":null,"replyCount":0,"likeCount":0,"wordCount":62,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[],"wiki":false,"version":2,"publicVersion":2,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":151,"username":"Rin","name":"Tomotake Rin","avatarUrl":"/uploads/image/dd/40/dd40df04070180d25dc835b8f1ad472ded596141699d602ec04ff13e27375bd9.avif","admin":false,"moderator":false,"signatureRaw":"无所谓，热带风味 :woman_gesturing_no:","signatureCooked":"

无所谓，热带风味 🙅‍♀️

\n"}},{"id":8042,"postNumber":8,"raw":"在等 offer 期间幻想自己被 phd 全聚德的时候","cooked":"

在等 offer 期间幻想自己被 phd 全聚德的时候

\n","createdAt":"2023-07-27 06:06:02.139554","updatedAt":"2023-07-27 06:06:02.139554","replyToPostNumber":null,"replyCount":0,"likeCount":0,"wordCount":17,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[],"wiki":false,"version":1,"publicVersion":1,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":426,"username":"Komeiji_Koishi","name":"Komeiji_Koishi","avatarUrl":"/uploads/image/5c/54/5c54227268cd2f275501ca5efdf88f7b1083908db846496c2c46eeb38cf65caa.avif","admin":true,"moderator":false,"signatureRaw":null,"signatureCooked":null}},{"id":8043,"postNumber":9,"raw":"现在感觉傻卵二次元救不了中国人了。。。至少得是沉淀沉淀的二次元","cooked":"

现在感觉傻卵二次元救不了中国人了。。。至少得是沉淀沉淀的二次元

\n","createdAt":"2023-07-27 06:08:23.887859","updatedAt":"2023-07-27 06:08:23.887859","replyToPostNumber":5,"replyCount":1,"likeCount":1,"wordCount":29,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[{"reaction":"❤️","count":1,"users":[{"id":3273,"username":"anon18815924","name":null}],"hasReacted":false}],"wiki":false,"version":1,"publicVersion":1,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":426,"username":"Komeiji_Koishi","name":"Komeiji_Koishi","avatarUrl":"/uploads/image/5c/54/5c54227268cd2f275501ca5efdf88f7b1083908db846496c2c46eeb38cf65caa.avif","admin":true,"moderator":false,"signatureRaw":null,"signatureCooked":null}},{"id":8057,"postNumber":10,"raw":"如果你指的是那些厕纸，那确实不行\n近几年厕纸是越来越多了啊……\n\n如果指的是废萌，那其实还是可以的\n毕竟都玉玉了，看点废萌被二次元美少女治愈一下不也挺好的\n而且废萌作品里也不乏像点兔这种佳作\n（当然如果是婆罗门的话确实会瞧不起废萌）","cooked":"

如果你指的是那些厕纸，那确实不行
\n近几年厕纸是越来越多了啊……

如果指的是废萌，那其实还是可以的
\n毕竟都玉玉了，看点废萌被二次元美少女治愈一下不也挺好的
\n而且废萌作品里也不乏像点兔这种佳作
\n（当然如果是婆罗门的话确实会瞧不起废萌）

\n","createdAt":"2023-07-27 07:58:08.426987","updatedAt":"2023-07-27 07:58:08.426987","replyToPostNumber":9,"replyCount":0,"likeCount":0,"wordCount":109,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[],"wiki":false,"version":1,"publicVersion":1,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":176,"username":"TouhouSumi","name":"东方澄","avatarUrl":"/uploads/image/0d/b8/0db83d4f9eb036fd09a9c3d520a6e0e7856751d1740332b9e45aa503d39dabed.avif","admin":false,"moderator":false,"signatureRaw":null,"signatureCooked":null}},{"id":29922,"postNumber":11,"raw":"记得在一本书中又看到过，过于担心孩子的母亲可能会产生杀死自己孩子的想法。大脑倾向于终结让自己感到痛苦的事物。","cooked":"

记得在一本书中又看到过，过于担心孩子的母亲可能会产生杀死自己孩子的想法。大脑倾向于终结让自己感到痛苦的事物。

\n","createdAt":"2024-04-16 11:34:19.527896","updatedAt":"2024-04-16 11:34:19.527896","replyToPostNumber":null,"replyCount":0,"likeCount":2,"wordCount":54,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[{"reaction":"😇️","count":1,"users":[{"id":31,"username":"TsuinoSora","name":null}],"hasReacted":false},{"reaction":"❤️","count":2,"users":[{"id":31,"username":"TsuinoSora","name":null},{"id":3273,"username":"anon18815924","name":null}],"hasReacted":false}],"wiki":false,"version":1,"publicVersion":1,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":340,"username":"卡冈图亚","name":"Breski","avatarUrl":"/uploads/image/ba/d3/bad35303ba63abad7e1347bb429056d369489ab4f0b238ca4c0e464511be73e0.avif","admin":false,"moderator":false,"signatureRaw":null,"signatureCooked":null}}],"hasMore":false,"lastReadPostNumber":4,"hasUrlPostNumber":true}