{"topic":{"id":12041,"title":"你来自河北","slug":"topic","userId":1047,"categoryId":4,"createdAt":"2024-05-10 01:24:50.464082","bumpedAt":"2024-05-21 11:21:24.030288","views":546,"postsCount":13,"highestPostNumber":14,"likeCount":9,"closed":false,"pinned":false,"pinnedGlobally":false,"pinnedAt":null,"pinnedUntil":null,"isBanner":false,"excerpt":"你来自河北，家里是公务员，严格管理。16 岁那年你考入衡水中学，军训上你被罚跑三百圈操场，力竭倒在操场上的你差点就因为猝死上了新闻。高中的第一个学期，你就听说有二十名学生跳楼自杀，五十个学生休学回家。你以为这一切不过是笑谈，毕竟，只有做题才能改变你的命运。你每天只用一分钟吃饭，食堂处处回响着你背书的声音。三年时间，你刷完了一万套真题。你踌躇满志，坚信自己能考上 985 踏上人生的顶峰。只是你未曾注意到，学校的走廊不知从何时起加上了阴…","deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"isPrivate":false,"isMembersOnly":false,"category":{"id":4,"name":"谈笑风生","slug":"general","color":"25AAE2"},"author":{"id":1047,"username":"anonymous_coward_old","name":"Anonymous Coward Old","avatarUrl":"/uploads/image/43/32/4332638c11248b8ff07033c11de0759a55205facfbec85e14458245a91991faf.avif"},"realAuthor":{"id":1047,"username":"anonymous_coward_old","name":"Anonymous Coward Old","avatarUrl":"/uploads/image/43/32/4332638c11248b8ff07033c11de0759a55205facfbec85e14458245a91991faf.avif"},"tags":[]},"posts":[{"id":31868,"postNumber":1,"raw":"[spoiler]\n\n你来自河北，家里是公务员，严格管理。16 岁那年你考入衡水中学，军训上你被罚跑三百圈操场，力竭倒在操场上的你差点就因为猝死上了新闻。\n\n高中的第一个学期，你就听说有二十名学生跳楼自杀，五十个学生休学回家。你以为这一切不过是笑谈，毕竟，只有做题才能改变你的命运。\n\n你每天只用一分钟吃饭，食堂处处回响着你背书的声音。三年时间，你刷完了一万套真题。你踌躇满志，坚信自己能考上 985 踏上人生的顶峰。只是你未曾注意到，学校的走廊不知从何时起加上了阴森森的铁窗，那个总是在上课时偷偷读小说的集美从何时起不见了踪影。\n\n高考前的誓师大会上，你听着讲台上四眼学长激情澎湃的发言：“哪怕我是一只乡下的土猪，也要去拱了大城市的白菜”，从未操过批的你，就此暗暗立下了去拱北京白菜的决心。\n\n高考你发挥失常，得了五百四十分，分数只够的上北京 211。望着收到北大录取通知书欣喜若狂的同学，你无比羡慕却又无可奈何。\n\n你进了大学。一切似乎都还过的去，只是当来自北京的室友笑着告诉你高中每天四点放学时，你回想起自己晚上十点在凄冷的晚风中走回十八人间宿舍的画面。不知为何，一向懦弱的你突然间有了一种作马加爵第二的冲动。\n\n高中无尽的做题带来的是无尽的创伤，现在一想到学习你就会生理性呕吐。你学会了翻墙。你看见了互联网上铺天盖地的对共产党的指责，但你只是将信将疑。最大的发现是墙外的色情网站。打胶成了你最大的爱好，当室友不在时躺在床上一边自慰一边想象着操可爱集美成了一天中最美好的时光。\n\n22 岁你带着 1.0 的绩点勉强毕业，你明白北京不属于你，所以决绝地连同自己未完成的梦想一起回了衡水。你用五年的时间考上了公务员。周围人一度质疑你在啃老，只有身为公务员的父母坚定支持着你的选择。虽然从他们的话语中，敏感的你也能品味出一丝失望之情。\n\n上岸后的你仍孑然一身，在父母的催促和亲戚的怂恿下你和一个来自河北农村的大饼脸织女结了婚。洞房之夜，望着自己未来妻子的身体，想到自己为得到这具身体付出的五十万金币，不知为何曾经那个拱北京白菜的梦想又闪现在你的脑海。\n\n30 岁的你有了一个女儿，黑皮肤，吊眼角，可爱程度和你在网上刷到的洋人小孩没法比。你的父母催着你要二胎，老婆却无论如何不愿意生了。你发现她越来越喜欢刷小红书，家务做的越来越少，时不时向你诉说女性被父权社会压迫的不公命运。你觉得她正变得陌生。\n\n你开始刷抖音，看今日头条。你渐渐相信大国崛起，热衷于揭露盎撒匪帮的阴谋，支持普大帝对欧洲的征服。正当你躺在沙发上播放着抖音 AI 幻想打下台湾操台妹时，微信上收到了老同学组织聚会的消息。你忽然想起那个本科时代和你关系不睦的北京同学。你点开他的朋友圈，发现他最新的朋友圈只有一张图，一本蓝色的丑国护照和一张微笑着的脸。\n\n冷风透过半开的窗户吹上你的面颊。你望着透明玻璃映出的你的脸，仿佛又看见了十五年前，那个知道考上衡中后满脸幸福的自己。\n\n[/spoiler]","cooked":"

你来自河北，家里是公务员，严格管理。16 岁那年你考入衡水中学，军训上你被罚跑三百圈操场，力竭倒在操场上的你差点就因为猝死上了新闻。

高中的第一个学期，你就听说有二十名学生跳楼自杀，五十个学生休学回家。你以为这一切不过是笑谈，毕竟，只有做题才能改变你的命运。

你每天只用一分钟吃饭，食堂处处回响着你背书的声音。三年时间，你刷完了一万套真题。你踌躇满志，坚信自己能考上 985 踏上人生的顶峰。只是你未曾注意到，学校的走廊不知从何时起加上了阴森森的铁窗，那个总是在上课时偷偷读小说的集美从何时起不见了踪影。

高考前的誓师大会上，你听着讲台上四眼学长激情澎湃的发言：“哪怕我是一只乡下的土猪，也要去拱了大城市的白菜”，从未操过批的你，就此暗暗立下了去拱北京白菜的决心。

高考你发挥失常，得了五百四十分，分数只够的上北京 211。望着收到北大录取通知书欣喜若狂的同学，你无比羡慕却又无可奈何。

你进了大学。一切似乎都还过的去，只是当来自北京的室友笑着告诉你高中每天四点放学时，你回想起自己晚上十点在凄冷的晚风中走回十八人间宿舍的画面。不知为何，一向懦弱的你突然间有了一种作马加爵第二的冲动。

高中无尽的做题带来的是无尽的创伤，现在一想到学习你就会生理性呕吐。你学会了翻墙。你看见了互联网上铺天盖地的对共产党的指责，但你只是将信将疑。最大的发现是墙外的色情网站。打胶成了你最大的爱好，当室友不在时躺在床上一边自慰一边想象着操可爱集美成了一天中最美好的时光。

22 岁你带着 1.0 的绩点勉强毕业，你明白北京不属于你，所以决绝地连同自己未完成的梦想一起回了衡水。你用五年的时间考上了公务员。周围人一度质疑你在啃老，只有身为公务员的父母坚定支持着你的选择。虽然从他们的话语中，敏感的你也能品味出一丝失望之情。

上岸后的你仍孑然一身，在父母的催促和亲戚的怂恿下你和一个来自河北农村的大饼脸织女结了婚。洞房之夜，望着自己未来妻子的身体，想到自己为得到这具身体付出的五十万金币，不知为何曾经那个拱北京白菜的梦想又闪现在你的脑海。

30 岁的你有了一个女儿，黑皮肤，吊眼角，可爱程度和你在网上刷到的洋人小孩没法比。你的父母催着你要二胎，老婆却无论如何不愿意生了。你发现她越来越喜欢刷小红书，家务做的越来越少，时不时向你诉说女性被父权社会压迫的不公命运。你觉得她正变得陌生。

你开始刷抖音，看今日头条。你渐渐相信大国崛起，热衷于揭露盎撒匪帮的阴谋，支持普大帝对欧洲的征服。正当你躺在沙发上播放着抖音 AI 幻想打下台湾操台妹时，微信上收到了老同学组织聚会的消息。你忽然想起那个本科时代和你关系不睦的北京同学。你点开他的朋友圈，发现他最新的朋友圈只有一张图，一本蓝色的丑国护照和一张微笑着的脸。

冷风透过半开的窗户吹上你的面颊。你望着透明玻璃映出的你的脸，仿佛又看见了十五年前，那个知道考上衡中后满脸幸福的自己。

\n","createdAt":"2024-05-10 01:24:50.57332","updatedAt":"2024-05-10 02:26:34.947805","replyToPostNumber":null,"replyCount":0,"likeCount":0,"wordCount":1162,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[],"wiki":false,"version":2,"publicVersion":2,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":1047,"username":"anonymous_coward_old","name":"Anonymous Coward Old","avatarUrl":"/uploads/image/43/32/4332638c11248b8ff07033c11de0759a55205facfbec85e14458245a91991faf.avif","admin":false,"moderator":false,"signatureRaw":null,"signatureCooked":null}},{"id":31869,"postNumber":2,"raw":"。。虽然但是我真是衡中的","cooked":"

。。虽然但是我真是衡中的

\n","createdAt":"2024-05-10 02:18:42.918033","updatedAt":"2024-05-10 02:18:42.918033","replyToPostNumber":null,"replyCount":1,"likeCount":0,"wordCount":11,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[],"wiki":false,"version":1,"publicVersion":1,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":199,"username":"Lrefrain","name":null,"avatarUrl":"/uploads/image/97/69/9769ddd94c97978cf278e3b4b997ba4b7cfb26abaa7f18aa567820370b7a8a5b.avif","admin":false,"moderator":false,"signatureRaw":null,"signatureCooked":null}},{"id":31870,"postNumber":3,"raw":"你不当燃料，谁来供给我的好日子啊 :rofl:","cooked":"

你不当燃料，谁来供给我的好日子啊 🤣

\n","createdAt":"2024-05-10 02:23:09.876781","updatedAt":"2024-05-10 02:23:09.876781","replyToPostNumber":null,"replyCount":0,"likeCount":1,"wordCount":17,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[{"reaction":"hugging_face_exploding_head","count":1,"users":[{"id":1288,"username":"LittleWangInShanghai","name":"小王在上海"}],"hasReacted":false},{"reaction":"❤️","count":1,"users":[{"id":1288,"username":"LittleWangInShanghai","name":"小王在上海"}],"hasReacted":false}],"wiki":false,"version":1,"publicVersion":1,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":4554,"username":"匿名172","name":"匿名172","avatarUrl":null,"admin":false,"moderator":false,"signatureRaw":null,"signatureCooked":null}},{"id":31871,"postNumber":4,"raw":"李总统！","cooked":"

李总统！

\n","createdAt":"2024-05-10 02:30:53.957352","updatedAt":"2024-05-10 02:30:53.957352","replyToPostNumber":null,"replyCount":1,"likeCount":0,"wordCount":4,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[],"wiki":false,"version":1,"publicVersion":1,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":1047,"username":"anonymous_coward_old","name":"Anonymous Coward Old","avatarUrl":"/uploads/image/43/32/4332638c11248b8ff07033c11de0759a55205facfbec85e14458245a91991faf.avif","admin":false,"moderator":false,"signatureRaw":null,"signatureCooked":null}},{"id":31872,"postNumber":5,"raw":"你这个是哪里复制的衡中文学吗 wow","cooked":"

你这个是哪里复制的衡中文学吗 wow

\n","createdAt":"2024-05-10 02:36:22.040231","updatedAt":"2024-05-10 02:36:22.040231","replyToPostNumber":4,"replyCount":0,"likeCount":0,"wordCount":15,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[],"wiki":false,"version":1,"publicVersion":1,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":199,"username":"Lrefrain","name":null,"avatarUrl":"/uploads/image/97/69/9769ddd94c97978cf278e3b4b997ba4b7cfb26abaa7f18aa567820370b7a8a5b.avif","admin":false,"moderator":false,"signatureRaw":null,"signatureCooked":null}},{"id":31883,"postNumber":6,"raw":"全中国都差不多，感觉还是和家庭还有价值观有关系。\n\n不过能考上衡中、211、编制，已经比许多人幸福了，唯一美中不足的就是大饼脸媳妇。我倒是觉得他没必要在河北、山东这些地方死磕，完全可以去四川、贵州等地试试。","cooked":"

全中国都差不多，感觉还是和家庭还有价值观有关系。

不过能考上衡中、211、编制，已经比许多人幸福了，唯一美中不足的就是大饼脸媳妇。我倒是觉得他没必要在河北、山东这些地方死磕，完全可以去四川、贵州等地试试。

\n","createdAt":"2024-05-10 06:56:11.369379","updatedAt":"2024-05-10 07:00:22.636513","replyToPostNumber":null,"replyCount":0,"likeCount":0,"wordCount":97,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[],"wiki":false,"version":3,"publicVersion":3,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":1288,"username":"LittleWangInShanghai","name":"小王在上海","avatarUrl":"/uploads/image/63/d2/63d25f4f2f6693f9ab450f32bd8d04e2d29f96a980b51555a585423f113c4a58.avif","admin":false,"moderator":false,"signatureRaw":null,"signatureCooked":null}},{"id":31892,"postNumber":7,"raw":"什么冀国版虎妞\n\n---\n\n建议本站 unlist 这种毫无营养挑起对立的文章","cooked":"

什么冀国版虎妞

建议本站 unlist 这种毫无营养挑起对立的文章

\n","createdAt":"2024-05-10 08:44:30.824658","updatedAt":"2024-05-10 08:45:42.317877","replyToPostNumber":null,"replyCount":0,"likeCount":4,"wordCount":26,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[{"reaction":"👍️","count":1,"users":[{"id":1288,"username":"LittleWangInShanghai","name":"小王在上海"}],"hasReacted":false},{"reaction":"plus1","count":1,"users":[{"id":1929,"username":"Quit","name":"Qwen"}],"hasReacted":false},{"reaction":"❤️","count":4,"users":[{"id":30,"username":"一只玉米人","name":"玉米🌽"},{"id":299,"username":"sola","name":null},{"id":1288,"username":"LittleWangInShanghai","name":"小王在上海"},{"id":1929,"username":"Quit","name":"Qwen"}],"hasReacted":false}],"wiki":false,"version":1,"publicVersion":1,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":1941,"username":"john","name":"John","avatarUrl":"/uploads/image/5a/04/5a0499fe826e0ab0e29d97bc3d98bbc1dfebf81309f4b4426ae0c7b62bd908e8.avif","admin":false,"moderator":false,"signatureRaw":"自黄药师黄仁勋来，世人皆爱猫。余独爱老鼠之，可爱之态，活泼之动，实为人所难以抗拒。喵~\n\n:mouse_hole: :mouse: :mouse: :computer_mouse: :mouse_trap: :sob_mouse: :sweat_smile_mouse: :sleeping_mouse: :rolling_on_the_floor_laughing_mouse: :revolving_hearts_mouse: :pleading_face_mouse: :nerd_face_mouse: :mouse_hole: :melting_face_mouse: :mask_mouse: :innocent_mouse: :hugging_face_mouse: :frog_mouse: :face_with_cowboy_hat_mouse: :clown_face_mouse: :cherry_blossom_mouse: :cat_mouse:","signatureCooked":"

自黄药师黄仁勋来，世人皆爱猫。余独爱老鼠之，可爱之态，活泼之动，实为人所难以抗拒。喵~

$\":mouse_hole:\"$ 🐁 🐁 🖱️ 🪤 $\":sob_mouse:\"$ $\":sweat_smile_mouse:\"$ $\":sleeping_mouse:\"$ $\":rolling_on_the_floor_laughing_mouse:\"$ $\":revolving_hearts_mouse:\"$ $\":pleading_face_mouse:\"$ $\":nerd_face_mouse:\"$ $\":mouse_hole:\"$ $\":melting_face_mouse:\"$ $\":mask_mouse:\"$ $\":innocent_mouse:\"$ $\":hugging_face_mouse:\"$ $\":frog_mouse:\"$ $\":face_with_cowboy_hat_mouse:\"$ $\":clown_face_mouse:\"$ $\":cherry_blossom_mouse:\"$ $\":cat_mouse:\"$

\n"}},{"id":31915,"postNumber":9,"raw":"我老师就是河北的，清本法硕博韩国博士后","cooked":"

我老师就是河北的，清本法硕博韩国博士后

\n","createdAt":"2024-05-10 13:14:26.655638","updatedAt":"2024-05-10 13:14:26.655638","replyToPostNumber":null,"replyCount":0,"likeCount":0,"wordCount":19,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[],"wiki":false,"version":1,"publicVersion":1,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":4511,"username":"admi0","name":"admin","avatarUrl":null,"admin":false,"moderator":false,"signatureRaw":null,"signatureCooked":null}},{"id":31981,"postNumber":10,"raw":"如此生活三十年是吧","cooked":"

如此生活三十年是吧

\n","createdAt":"2024-05-11 10:45:14.05274","updatedAt":"2024-05-11 10:45:14.05274","replyToPostNumber":null,"replyCount":1,"likeCount":4,"wordCount":9,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[{"reaction":"🤣️","count":1,"users":[{"id":30,"username":"一只玉米人","name":"玉米🌽"}],"hasReacted":false},{"reaction":"wave_gif","count":1,"users":[{"id":1288,"username":"LittleWangInShanghai","name":"小王在上海"}],"hasReacted":false},{"reaction":"❤️","count":4,"users":[{"id":30,"username":"一只玉米人","name":"玉米🌽"},{"id":175,"username":"argmin","name":null},{"id":1047,"username":"anonymous_coward_old","name":"Anonymous Coward Old"},{"id":1288,"username":"LittleWangInShanghai","name":"小王在上海"}],"hasReacted":false}],"wiki":false,"version":1,"publicVersion":1,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":1850,"username":"Reina","name":"星野露比","avatarUrl":"/uploads/image/eb/04/eb04cff2678548ca108c69ddfc1d1cb815ef082d3966133dc2923d7b34630648.avif","admin":false,"moderator":false,"signatureRaw":null,"signatureCooked":null}},{"id":31983,"postNumber":11,"raw":"大石碎胸口","cooked":"

大石碎胸口

\n","createdAt":"2024-05-11 11:11:09.676061","updatedAt":"2024-05-11 11:11:09.676061","replyToPostNumber":10,"replyCount":0,"likeCount":0,"wordCount":5,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[],"wiki":false,"version":1,"publicVersion":1,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":1288,"username":"LittleWangInShanghai","name":"小王在上海","avatarUrl":"/uploads/image/63/d2/63d25f4f2f6693f9ab450f32bd8d04e2d29f96a980b51555a585423f113c4a58.avif","admin":false,"moderator":false,"signatureRaw":null,"signatureCooked":null}},{"id":33843,"postNumber":12,"raw":"校友！捉~","cooked":"

校友！捉~

\n","createdAt":"2024-05-19 03:28:29.136359","updatedAt":"2024-05-19 03:28:29.136359","replyToPostNumber":2,"replyCount":0,"likeCount":0,"wordCount":5,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[],"wiki":false,"version":1,"publicVersion":1,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":4609,"username":"卢塔司","name":null,"avatarUrl":null,"admin":false,"moderator":false,"signatureRaw":null,"signatureCooked":null}},{"id":33948,"postNumber":13,"raw":"我还真就来自河北、衡中毕业。但土猪哥在衡中并没有多受欢迎，写出这段话的应该不是衡中学生；而且土猪哥发表土猪宣言应该是 20 年吧，你文中描述的这届大学还没毕业呢，咋就开始想三十岁的事了，没必要","cooked":"

我还真就来自河北、衡中毕业。但土猪哥在衡中并没有多受欢迎，写出这段话的应该不是衡中学生；而且土猪哥发表土猪宣言应该是 20 年吧，你文中描述的这届大学还没毕业呢，咋就开始想三十岁的事了，没必要

\n","createdAt":"2024-05-21 09:41:10.404733","updatedAt":"2024-05-21 09:41:10.404733","replyToPostNumber":null,"replyCount":0,"likeCount":0,"wordCount":93,"liked":false,"bookmarked":false,"polls":[],"reactions":[],"wiki":false,"version":1,"publicVersion":1,"deletedAt":null,"isAnonymous":false,"user":{"id":118,"username":"game","name":null,"avatarUrl":null,"admin":false,"moderator":false,"signatureRaw":null,"signatureCooked":null}},{"id":33952,"postNumber":14,"raw":"河北师大附中乒乓少年背向我","cooked":"

河北师大附中乒乓少年背向我

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